Frank’s Friday

X-rayIf it were socially acceptable I would kick cats on sight, but yet I find myself compulsively singing the Meow Mix song when I’m by myself.  This is just one of the symptoms that lead me to believe that I am an emerging schizophrenic.  Others include my inability to turn off an infomercial before it’s completed one entire loop from the moment I turned it on, my extreme hatred of baker’s dozens, and my compulsive collecting of other people’s x-rays.  If there were a way for me to go to the doctor and pull the old trick of describing these symptoms as those “of a friend,” I would do it.  I need to know what’s wrong, but I don’t want to be medicated and therapied within an inch of my life.  At the end of the day though I really just love sitting in the dark, eating a dozen muffins, singing the Meow Mix song and looking at someone’s broken femur by the light of a Steambuggy infomercial.  I can’t imagine a more perfect night.

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