Chelsea the Emotional Vampire

Air drying brasThis is the worst christening I’ve ever been to in my life.  Granted I’m not like, the christening queen or anything – this is only like my second one – but seriously, this is stupid as hell.  It’s Sunday and even though there’s no football on, I still have important things to do.  I got to work out and go to Whole Foods and wash my bras in the sink and hang them up with enough time to dry overnight before my interdepartmental meetings tomorrow.  This shit is gobbling up my entire morning and the baptism itself apparently only takes 10 minutes and then the kid is saved and we all go eat some cold cuts and those crispy wafers covered in sugar – what are they called again?  Wanda something, something with wafers.  Anyway, I’m going to get powdered sugar all over my Ann Taylor Loft skirt that I just had dry cleaned and even though the label says it can be put in the washer, I don’t want it to get pilly like I’m on welfare or some shit.  Great, finally, the boy in a dress is going up to the front.  Melinda looks pretty happy – maybe I should cry or something when this is all over so she can see it moved me.

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