Revenge is a Wish Your Heart Makes

Jiminy CricketJoey should never have started having those people over without asking me.  He knows, KNOWS that I’m taking big tests this week and next, but he still has forty-something people over here on a Tuesday night to watch TV and holler at the screen and eat all my cereal like a pack of termites attacking a wood cabin.  That’s what gave me the idea, actually.  I started out looking at termites, but I think our landlord’s basically a good guy and I don’t want to cause any long-term problems to the house.  Then clicking around on the termite site send me to the worm site sent me to the cricket site.  And it all just fell into place.  The crickets will breed and chirp and apparently start to smell real bad but he won’t be able to find all of them in his room and get rid of them.  I asked at the pet store – this won’t be nice chirping like people idealize hearing in the countryside.  Nah, this will be loud, uEvEn noises, coming out of every crack in his room.  Smelling up the joint worse than it already is, with his whey powder and dirty UnderArmour scattered all around.  I’m sure I’ll be able to hear them through the shared wall, but I don’t think they’ll keep me up.  No, I think I’ll be able to sleep right through it.

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